I had known since I was in my twenties that I had fibroids but in 2003 I found out I had ovarian cysts and stage 4 (out of 4 stages) endometriosis. The doctors wanted to see what was going on and extract as much of the “bad stuff” as possible so I had a myectomy. The treatment that followed was with a drug called Lupron which stopped my menstrual cycle for six months. This allowed my body to heal from the surgery and without my menses I was not producing the endometrial tissue that was running rampant in my body. I was then told I had one year to get pregnant. This was difficult considering I was not in a relationship. I dated and I even asked a few friends if they would consider “being my baby daddy”…to no avail. I decided if I wanted to have a biological child it was now or never. I did not make this decision easily. I also received many opinions on what they thought about my choice to be a single parent… I didn’t care. Okay that is not true, I did care. I spent many nights, weeks and even months crying and trying to figure out what I did to end up this situation. What had I done in my life to warrant not finding a mate (I was 33) and infertile. I cried because this was not the life I had planned for myself. I had to give up the old dream and I had to create a new dream. A dream that I could still have the life that I wanted but I had to be flexible about it. I realized that life was simply a happy financially stable family which I knew I could create for myself. I finally gave myself permission to create that life and not be ashamed of how I decide to create it.
I researched my options. I chose to use Shady Grove Fertility because they were large and seemed to have a good reputation. I began my treatments. Although I was considered infertile, the insurance company had protocol I had to follow: insemination prior to In Vitro Fertilization (IVF) was required. I went through 3 Intrauterine Inseminations (IUIs) prior to my IVFs. My nightmares began with the IVFs. On approximately September 13, 2005 after my first IVF; I began to have stomach cramps. I notified Shady Grove and spoke with my nurse. I was told it was part of the process. Unfortunately the IVF did not work and I did not conceive. The pain I was having subsided temporarily while I was on suppressive medication (birth control) in preparation of my second IVF. However, I began experiencing night sweats in October. On November 8 I began my second round of IVF treatment. Within one week of embryo transfer (November 26) I began having extreme stomach pains. I contacted Shady Grove a couple of times during the month of December before they finally told me to come in. When I finally went in one of the doctor’s told me “you look fine, I’m not going to request a blood work-up”. I went home and continued to have night sweats and cramping. I contacted Shady Grove a few more times and was told “if I am still having pains I should see my gynecologist.” Now, this was a little odd to me because I had been under Shady Grove’s care for a year not my gynecologist.
On Dec. 27th I woke up at 4:00 a.m. screaming at the top of my lungs in excruciating pain. (I have a pretty high threshold for pain so when I tell you it felt like my insides were being torn out I am telling you the truth). I called my friend Ariana to take me to the hospital (I guess I could have called an ambulance but that would have been so sterile, who would have held my hand during the whole ordeal?). I went to the emergency room where I waited over two hours before a doctor saw me despite my obvious pelvic pain. After spending almost twelve hours in the emergency room I was released with only a prescription for pain medication and the advice to see my doctor the next day. Following Shady Grove’s advice, I went to see my gynecologist. Within the first 30 seconds she had me on the table she said, “I don’t know what is wrong with you but I know you need to be admitted into the hospital immediately.” Once at the hospital, blood was taken for a comprehensive blood evaluation--which immediately showed signs of an infection. A comment was made by a doctor that the emergency room did not do a comprehensive blood evaluation on me and he was not sure why. Had they done so, I would have been admitted to hospital on the 27th instead of the 28th. Although there is no way to tell, I wonder what an earlier admittance of 24 to 36 hours would have prevented. Because of the infection I was being treated with antibiotics; they still did not know where the infection was or how severe it was. Let’s see if I can make this clearer. When the doctor’s entered my room it was like an episode of the television drama House. They came in a pack. They said they expected me to be in a coma. When you are healthy your white blood cells number between 7-9,000; mine numbered over 18,000. They said if I had waited another day I would have been dead or in a coma. The infectious disease specialist kept asking me "didn't your doctor's know you were sick?" I kept responding that I was telling them but they were not listening to me. The whole time I was in the hospital the infectious disease specialist could not get over how sick I was and that Shady Grove did nothing about it.
I was taken in for surgery in hopes the doctors could locate the troubled area. When they opened me up, the infection was so bad they could not see any of my organs. They had to close me up. My mother was then told that I would be put on the maximum antibiotics that my body would tolerate to see if they could get the infection under control. After 33 hours passed, I became septic (my blood stream became toxic) and emergency surgery was required including two blood transfusions (one prior to surgery and one during surgery). My GYN was also in the surgery and said it was the worse surgery she had ever been in. They had to remove almost a liter of fluid and pus before they could even get to my organs. What this means is that my organs were deteriorating inside of me, they were liquefying. When they finally got to my organs nothing could be saved. The end result was I had a total hysterectomy and an appendectomy. After the surgery the doctors were happy it was over but all they said to my mother was "we are not out of the woods, all we can do now is wait." They thought I was going to die…plain and simple. This was on day four. I was in the hospital for 15 days. I was on disability for 12 weeks. My first day back to work, I was told I was being downsized…lack of work. Could my year have gotten any worse!?
This was April 2006. I spent the next few months of my “summer vacation” depressed then I decided I had to move on and figure out what to do with my life. It was either go back and work for someone else again or start my own business. I was tired of giving everyone else control so it was the latter. I decided it was time for me to live my ultimate life…I started a company that would allow me and others to live their ultimate life. I cannot change what happened to me but, I can change my perspective on it…I have chosen not to wallow in it and be sad. I have decided to use my pain for good. Just as in the story of Joseph in the bible his dilemma turned out to be a blessing--so shall mine. My blessing is my adoption. I also pray that a blessing may come to others through this story.
