Tuesday, November 18, 2008

No More Tears

It's always better in the morning.  These past few years have not been easy for me and yesterday was like the sour icing on my dropped cake.  I felt like my world had come to a complete halt.  

Early this morning I prayed and decided to give it up to God.  So much has happened and it has all happened for a reason.  I know that and have always believed so why stop now just because things aren't going my way?  He has never forsaken me before and will not now.  His Grace and Mercy are so apparent in my life how can I be anything but humbled and grateful. 

I've been on this path for over a year now; I was planning on submitting my dossier in the next few weeks so it would have been two years when Baby I came home anyway.  Two years will move fast.  Who knows what other blessings he will have in store for me during that time.  I have a lot of things I need to do so I'll just get to doing them.  I'm sure I'll still have pangs of sadness and want to rush the process but I'm good...God is working my life out.  

All of the things I can look forward to doing for two more years:
  • sleeping
  • traveling
  • shopping
  • spending money on me
  • fixing up my house
  • working late
  • dating (maybe finding a husband...lol)
  • sleeping more
  • not cooking for two
  • working on my new blog (I'll post the link soon)
  • starting to work towards my black belt
  • living fabulously
Hey, the more I read this list I'm thinking I'm going to like this (smile).   Maybe I'll get a dog.  

Be Blessed,

Tami

30 comments:

Leslie said...

I'm so sorry, Tami, but glad God is giving you peace. Praying that He brings your daughter to you before you know it.

kristine said...

Yes, there is so much to do. I lost my job on Friday (knew it was coming) but now we wait to submit the dossier. We're with WHFC so once the dossier IS in we will have an 18 to 24 mos wait most likely if all goes well. Who can say. Prayers everyday and live life really big.

Tami said...

Leslie-

Maybe I can now adopt a sibling group! I think I'll ask...

Kerri said...

I'm glad you're feeling more positive today. My first adoption took 2 1/2 years and was a really hard journey. I almost gave up and tried to get pregnant. I'm so glad I stuck it out and got the most amazing little girl in the world.
Stay strong and hopeful...

Robbin said...

Tami, yes I think I will get me another doggy too!!!
I went back and forth: dog/boyfriend... dog/boyfriend. There was no competition there!


Robbin

Leslie said...

That would be great if you could adopt a sibling group, Tami! AAI is also saying that singles will also still be able to adopt children with HIV or other special needs--and no wait! New blog huh? How fun!

Anonymous said...

Hello Tami-

I don't know you but I've been following your blog as I plan to start my own adoption soon. When I read your last post, I immediately started calling the agencies on my list to find out more about the situation. Of the five I've talked to, only Gladney has told me that singles are now put on hold. I spoke with a lovely woman at Adoption Associates and she confirmed that there would be no delay or ban against singles adopting from Ethiopia at this time. She seemed confident in this and assured me that they recieve daily updates from the director in Ethiopia.

I know that this is probably a very difficult thing that you're going through, and perhaps it is just part of God's timing, but maybe you won't experience this with another agency? I don't know if this was any help to you, but I thought that I'd just pass along the information I gathered this morning.

In case you're curious, the Ethiopia program director at Adoption Associates is located in their Jenison office. The number is (616) 677-0677.

Hope you're feeling better!

Ellen said...

My heart is sad for you today> I like your list a day later. Praying for comfort today.

ellen

Tracey said...

I look forward to living vicariously through your adventures the next couple of years. Hang in there. Lean on friends, family and God. And remember, Amara was considered special needs. That is still an option I think.

Katy said...

New blog? Yesssssss! I admire your resolve and ambition.

Gracie's Mom said...

Tami, I am just speechless. I feel like all of you guys are Gracie's cyber aunties. I will keep praying that something changes. So sorry Tami.

Jocelyn said...

Glad to see you're happier today. Stay strong like we know you are!

Freda said...

Tami,
I admire your spirit and will keep you and the others in my prayers.

Kari J said...

You hang in there girl. I know Gods grace is there. I am glad you will keep up a blog.

Anonymous said...

i just wanted to say that i'm really sorry to hear this for you and i will be keeping your in my prayers.
hanna
http://ourbluebirdhouse.vangrowstudio.com

Anna said...

A new blog? same topic?

maybe trying another agencey is worth looking into....

Im not a god person but I do believe if you want something with all your heart and soul, you can make it happen....

Monica Lidya's Mom said...

Hi Tami,

I am soooooo sorry that you are going through this. But I love that you are still able to make lemonade out of lemons with your fabulous list!

I also agree with the other poster and gently suggest that you check out other agencies if that is at all possible.

Monica

Monica

Rebecca said...

Oh Tami, I'm so sorry! Trials are never fun...I'm glad to see that you're looking for good in this.

And, yes. I think you should get a dog :)

los cazadores said...

Tami, I am heartbroken for you - I really am. I don't know you, but judging from what I can read on your blog, you seem to be a beautiful, sweet soul that would be an incredible mother. I'm sorry that it is going to take so long. I am so bummed out for you right now. But, I am glad you can find strength in your faith. Your faith and integrity prove that you are an incredible gal.

Wish I knew what else to say...

Hugs hugs,

Cindy

haze said...

WHAT?? 2 days away and I miss all this drama?

a) I'm glad you felt better after a good sleep and a good cry.
b) I'm with the others - is there another agency you can use?
c) I'll email you.

Anonymous said...

Tami-

I know what you are going through. I am also in one of Gladney's groups. I know it is hard to think of how much longer we have to wait but we must have faith in God and His plan. I think we will be better mothers because of all we have to go through to get our children. I too made a mental list of things I can do before my daughter comes home. We might be kindred spirits because sleeping was also on the top of my list. I look forward to your new blog or continuation of this one. Tonya

Annie said...

Tami--
I give you so much credit for being so strong. You are putting it in the Lord's hands and that is not easy to do. Praying that a change from the MOWA allows you to adopt sooner.

Tami said...

Hi All!

Thanks for the kind words. I don't have any choice but trying to make the best of what has happened...life gives you lemons you make lemonade!

I know understand the 4 year wait to China adoptions!

Big Hugs!

Jennifer said...

What a great attitude, hang in there! I'm a single too, waiting on the word from my agency....glad you are staying strong and positive.

Malia'sMama said...

Tami, I am sorry that this seems to be reality for you. Here, in Ontario, we are still being told no such changes have been put in place by MOWA- our agency site even confirms it, so though you have great attitude about it, I hope that somehow, it's wrong- you will be a mom in 2009.

Tami said...

Yes, so many questions about agencies in the states and even in Canada and other countries. I dunno what is true. I only know what my agency told me. All I can do is what I am doing. What God has for me is for me. I pray that all good things and my baby will come to me in 2009! Thanks guys!

Jen said...

Tami,
Just found your blog. I love your spirit. My family will keep you in our prayers. 2009 will be a great year!

iesha said...

Goodness, this is what I get for falling behind on blog reading! Tami, God is good all the time and all the time God is good. I offer you my mantra of peace...just keeo saying "All is Well" because it is. I sincerely believe there is a reason for everything. Just keep your head up and be open to the opportunities that will be presented to you to gently nudge you in the right direction. For example, I just found out that I will probably be laid off from work soon. But I've been praying for intervention to help me towards a better career. (God knowns I'm stubborn and sometimes just need a kick in the rear!) I guarantee an opportunity is about to open up to you to teach you or to guide you. You will be a mommy before you know it!!
P.S: Don't even try to not update us for 2 years! It's not like I live near you and can call you up to catch up over 'tinis. Throw us a bone!
Selam! :-)

haze said...

Want something different to blog about? I tagged you:
http://forneko.blogspot.com/2008/12/tagged-book.html

Dina said...

URGENT: Im single too, hoping to adopt from Ethiopia.I live in Europe and my agency told me that whoever sends the dossier in Ethiopia WITHIN the 15th of December this year, will make normally the adoption, even if single. You can maybe still make it? After it will virtually be impossible cause couples will be always prefered. Come on, I know you feel down, but you have to make a last effort and see if you can still make it!!! All the best from Denmark, Dina