Entrance to Wonder

There would have been no wonder without the doorway that Alice finally managed to enter. That colorful and whimsical doorway foretold what adventures were waiting for Alice on the other side.

That must mean that Baby I must have a fabulous door for her room and life of wonder to come. You got it! I bought my baby a new door today (the room didn't have a door so and any ole door would not do, nope!).

Behold the entrance to Baby I's Wonderland (oh, the picture stinks b/c I have no camera). It is so tiny it's anti-climatic I know but you get the point. :-).

Adoption Timeline

Why is it that my last Adoption Timeline update was 12/9/09?

LOL

I pretty much suck.

Hey Robbin?

Can you give me some dates for this timeline? You keep my dates better than me!

Guess I'll update them this weekend!

BTW...I'm going crazy over here. I must be if I'm blogging when I know no one reads! I think I'll email Gladney! LOL

Today I Shed a Tear (Tears)

Today I shed my first adoption tear.

No, I had a big cry and it was at work.

Why?

A former co-worker had just returned from a soul searching two-month trip to India to visit her birth and adoptive parents. She was talking about how great the trip was, but at some point in the conversation she mentioned how her birth mother had been sad at different points in her life (she knew her, although she didn't find out that it was her birth mother until she was an adult) about giving her up for adoption (to a family member). At that point it clicked that my excitement (about this adoption) was at the cost of someone's grief. How excited I was, but how sad a mother and family must be to be giving a child up. That made my heart literally hurt and stomach sink, I just started crying at work. My friend had to come across the desk and calm me down then take me and buy me hot chocolate. She provided as much encouragement and support as she could and the only words I could muster were:

"I just want to do the right thing and be a great mother."

I guess as I'm on the final countdown to my referral it is getting very real and these are probably normal worries. I just pray that the little spirit that God blesses me to watch over that her birth mother and family have enough faith to know that she will be ok. That God has placed her with a mother who has been preparing for her and waiting for her for a long time. That she will love, support, guide and raise her to be a proud, smart, respectful, Christian, fun loving, creative and confidant woman. Proud to be all that she is by birth and by growth. Baby I has much to look forward to and as her mother so do I and even with the tears today and the ones I will undoubtedly have to come, SO DO I! I can't wait.

Stay Tuned...

Baby I in Wonderland

I'm working on the nursery! If you didn't remember (how could you since it was years ago) I am a part time interior decorator, so I am somewhat particular when it comes to my design. Translation very slow! I have been thinking about this nursery for a year! LOL It is going to be a combination of the following three rooms -- if you have any imagination but there won't be any big pictures of panties I promise! I started to block that out but it made me laugh so I left it alone, I figured you would scratch your head a little and say what the heck is that Tami up to now? In my house we are calling it Baby I in Wonderland. ;-)

Because I like it!

Well, I would narrow the names down but why spoil all the fun? Maybe you guessed it. Maybe you didn't. Will my feelings be hurt if you don't like my kid's name? Nope! Why? Because...I like it! And so will my little Baby I.

No referral news yet.

Top Baby Names

Okay, my faithful blog friend Sen (why am I not connected with you on facebook) asked me about Baby names. Let's play. I already have a name picked out because...I like it! So, why don't you guess. Feel free to give me your feedback, I'm not going to change it...it will just be fun. Will I tell you before referral? No. lol If you know her name...play along and act stupid. ;-)

Top Names for Baby I:

1. Icelynn
2. Isabella
3. Ivy
4. Isla
5. Isley
6. Iman
7. Isra
8. Ila
9. Ilana
10. Imani

So much for 5. It's in there. Good Luck. Maybe I'll narrow it down to Top 5 in a week or so.

Still Here

Yes, I am still here.

No news.

Nothing new.

Just boring ole me. I had dreams of posting baby pictures of me up until the referral but that didn't happen. I had dreams of taking pictures until she came home but that isn't happening. Oh, I had so many dreams. Now, I just dream of getting up everyday and putting one foot in front of the other. Yes, it is like that some days. UGGGGHHH!

I have started shopping again. Yay! Working on the nursery and playroom. I'm busy. Maybe I do have some pictures to post.

Who knows, I may get a burst of energy one day.

If you still read this...you get much credit for following my longggggg journey. Thanks for your support.