Introducing Isley Rahwa

On June 29th the sweetest face ever became my precious daughter. I am over the moon happy! It has been a very long seven years to parenthood and four years in the adoption process. Whew. But look at this face, it was worth it in the end. I love this girl! Did I say how happy I am yet? :-) Will post more this weekend. Thank you for following this crazy journey in my life. xoxox

Today Brought More Changes...

Today brought more changes and more uncertainty. There are no answers. Nothing is clear. However, I have made the decision to begin living my life not in fear, hate or worry, but in peace and joy. I don't know what tomorrow will bring, or how long this process will continue to take, but I won't waste anymore time stressing about it. It is wasted energy. What will be, will be.

New Court Date

I woke up yesterday and decided I was going to be at peace no matter what. And lo and behold that afternoon I received a new court date. June 23! Prayerfully I will receive a ruling that day and can show off pictures of my baby girl finally! Keep your fingers crossed and hands clasped.

The Golden Top

Besides complaining I actually have been doing some fun things while waiting for Ms. Isley to come home. I finished updating her dresser, which has now taken up residence in the kitchen while I work on the ceiling for her room. Yes, her ceiling! It is a harlequin design similar to the dresser...ahh wait and see.

Before:

What was wrong with the before you ask? It just wasn't girly and youthful enough. So, with a little turquoise paint from my floor project, gold leafing, green frog tape, spray shellac and new colorful knobs, I created a beauty for my beauty.

After:

Disclaimer: the room was a little dark when I took the pictures, so you can't see how beautiful it really is...so much for cell phone cameras, but you get the idea.

What's Bugging Me Today

The other families that didn't pass court received new court dates, but no not Tami. Seriously, I feel like someone has it out for me. The past 6 years have been so incredibly difficult for me, I'm trying so hard to turn it all around, but can a sista get a break? I mean how difficult is it to go see your child, leave them in a foster care center, then have someone say, we will get back to you. I missing all her major milestones, I'm not there to comfort her when she is sad and lonely or see the joy when she smiles. She is going to be more and more delayed with each moment and frankly I'm so over it all. I just want my baby home! Yeah, 4 years of patience is GONE!

Sorry I kept you. What's eating Tami today?

It's been a long time, I shouldn't have left you.

Without a strong rhyme to step to.

Think of how many weak shows you slept through.

Time's up, I'm sorry I kept you.

Yes, I’m back. It’s been six months. S-I-X. Since starting my blog this is the longest hiatus yet, but let me tell you. I need a break from Groundhog Day I seem to be in.

I know you are sitting there reading this saying one of the following things:

· Tami what happened with the call?

· Did you go to Ethiopia yet?

· Is Isley home?

· What the #$%@ is going on?

Well, over here in Tamiland - remember the place that is all about me – pretty much it is the same crap, except with a different situation. Oh, do I sound a tad bit angry, bitter or fed up? Yup! Pretty much I am! I will fill you in on all the little details in the upcoming posts, but let me answer a few outstanding questions.

1. The call. I was in total shock and then I looked at my daughter’s picture and wasn’t sure if the agency didn’t make a mistake. Truth.

2. The referral. I got over my insanity and began falling in love with the photo and the idea of finally being a mother.

3. Ethiopia. I went to Ethiopia and fell totally and completely in love with my daughter…crying on the way out because I had no idea when I would go back to bring her home for good and that was March 13.

4. Isley. WOW. My baby girl is amazing. I love MY KID and she loves her momma. The nannies at the foster care center said she doesn’t like new people and they were amazed that she did not fuss one time with me. Not one time. We were like yin and yang from the first moment we saw each other. Did I mention how beautiful and sweet she is?

5. Waiting. My waiting has been terrible! I received my referral Dec. 8^th. Had court on March 9^th. Failed court on June 8^th. Did I mention June 7^th was my birthday? Thanks for the memories.

6. Changes. I probably hold the recognition for being the person in this process the longest. I have experienced almost every change that Ethiopian adoption can give you and can I tell you…I am worn the hell out. Sorry, I’m trying to keep this as G rated as possible, but I am EMOTIONALLY SPENT!

7. Now what? Well, I keep waiting. I received the referral of my beauty when she was 3 months and now she is 9 months. At best it will be two more months before she comes home. Let’s not talk about the worst. If the worst happens I’ll be collecting for a second trip to spend more time with my baby.

That’s about it! Sorry for the months delay and for this post not being encouraging, supportive or giving more information. Frankly, I just needed an outlet to provide a $%(* fest! I so need a different way to release all these emotions and kickboxing once a week is not enough. I need to kick box EVERYDAY!

Oh, I don’t even have the patience/energy right now to spell, grammar or content check this, so this is a one thought, one type, hit blogger post! Check it in your head for me, I know you all are way smart! Maybe I’ll do more of those in the upcoming future: What the heck is eating (or beating) Tami today?

You Can Call Her...

ISLEY

Yes, Sen and Mercy you were right in the name game. Baby I's name is Isley "R" (oh, yes another letter we cannot share the official name of until we pass court). After looking at that beautiful face I just couldn't stand to call her Baby I again.

And no one got the date guess correct. And Rebecca you were the only one to guess 3 months for Isley's age. Now what do you win? I have no idea! LOL I'm terrible at mailing things, but since I'm in such a great mood these days send me your mailing address and I'll find a little token to send.

So, until I write the next post, here are some fun facts about Isley R, she:

• is a happy and healthy 3 month old (translation...stealing the other kids bottles)
• looks like a chocolate cherub (translation: sweet and beautiful with pouty lips) or an M&M (translation: round and bald head)
• has the biggest prettiest eyes (translation: will be able to wrap everyone around her finger...my girl)
• is very verbal (translation: has a big mouth like the rest of her family)
• loves to play (translation: will be creative)
• has the cutest little smirks and smiles (translation: will get into everything)

Thanks all for being such a great source of support throughout the years. And I am so excited about all the new Gladney APs that stopped by to say congrats...what an awesome community! Now, I can finally get to some real posts again! I'm even going to get a new blog and I have a new title I'm excited about! I'll move over when Isley comes home and the adventure begins. Wanna know what it is or should I wait? See I'm pretty verbal too (translation: big mouth). ;-)

Wanna Play Another Game?

What do you think this is?

Want to start Again With the Date Game?

Well, since I haven't gotten a referral yet, that means no one was a winner. So, how about trying again...nothing beats a failure but a try. What day will I receive a referral? LOL Have fun! (ha ha) In the meantime I guess I'll send off paperwork for updating fingerprints! sighh

And I Wait...

This is pretty much what my family room looks like right now. Me trying to keep busy, with my phone(s) on the table, food, nail polish, bills, comforters, laundry, movies, books...ughh, sighhhh. What is this like week 226? Seriously! I'm over this already! Baby I will be like 20 or better yet I'll be like 60 when she comes home. Oy vey!

Edit: I officially calculated how long I have been in this process and as of Nov. 28th it has been 1,255 Days -- or -- 179 Weeks and 2 Days. I'm ridiculous and now should be shot (figuratively please)! I know life happens but ughhhhhhh!

ARGHHHHHHHH!

Since this is a Christian Blog... I won't say uncool words but WTX%$#!

I am so loosing my mind over here! Shut up Robbin!

H&M has finally realized diversity pays the rent

I'm not a big H&M shopper. The clothes are cute, but they don't last long. In my youth (yea, I said it) I would have been all over H&M like white on rice, but now I only go in occasionally. Those occasions are when I am with a younger friend who is dying to go or with one of my BFF who is a size negligible and will look good in a brown paper sack (even at age xx...older). Usually I will pick up an item or two but that's it. It's always a great idea to mix the inexpensive with my vintage, TJMaxx and couture pieces. I also hear they have a kids line so this will be awesome for Baby I...well that is until I see how they wash. I've seen a few pieces in the thrift store and they looked trashed! Maybe Not?

While I may not be a fan of shopping at H&M their holiday campaign is fabulous! Look who is represented:

Yay, beautiful Ethiopian and Somalian women - Waris Dirie and Liya Kebde - do your thing! They make me want to go buy something...what the heck, my own stimulus plan!

G-MA's Surprise Baby Shower

My mother is so excited about Baby I and all of her friends know it! I've finally gotten her under control about asking me "what is going on" because it drives me a little nuts (more than I already am). When people ask me "so, what's going on with your daughter?" I know they mean well, but does anyone not think that they would not know (especially my family) when I receive (and accept) a referral. It will be pretty clear that Baby I is in the house. Oh, yes it will...Baby I will be in the house. And she may even have a name. ;-)

Oh, I digress, this post wasn't supposed to be about me...back to my mother. She is so excited! This past weekend her girlfriends told her they were getting together for drinks and they gave her a grandmother's shower. Awwww. Baby I's first shower! Ok, Tami's friends...you all need to get on it...dang it back to me again. tee hee.

Check the goods out below, nice huh?

Sit still Too Long and I'll Paint You

No, there has not been any movement with Baby I or you can call her Isa, Isla, Ivy, Isley or Imani. :-) Robbin told me I'm not stable right now; actually she told Celeste, but then she told me. What a friend, however she is right. You know that FBI list the APs made? I never, ever, ever checked it until recently, now I'm a mad woman about it! I must check that list 6 times a day. Oh, wait... I haven't checked it in a few hours I'll be back. Nothing new, just the same family who went on the waitlist the same day as I and they were referred twin girls (awesome). Hey, I want to know if anyone has gotten a referral before me! And if so, who? Then why! LOL LUNATIC! ME! I admit it!

In my off lunatic moments, I am doing useful projects like repainting my house. Yes, my entire house. I was just bored with it. I decorated my house about 5 or more years ago and it just didn't reflect who I am today, so it was time to start over. I have plenty of energy now, what the heck. Word to the wise, don't come and visit me or if you do, don't stand still too long because if you do, I just may paint you. Guess I'll go back to painting the living room and sunroom. I'm a little ADD so I have to do like 2-3 projects at once. I'll let you know when everything is finished and send you to whatever blog is showing my home which will more than likely be Desire to Inspire. It won't be until the spring/summer, I'll let you know.

Well...

Those who said 10.20 and 10.21 for referral dates? WRONG!

Still no referral.

No one said any day next week, I don't know if that is a good sign or a bad sign.

Anywhoo...maybe next week is "the week."

Have a great weekend!

Bi-Racial Hair Video...a must see

If you have followed this blog since the beginning (silly you) then you know I used to be controversial. However, after three years (yes 3) I got old and tired, the adoption process beat me up and I was forced to chill out. Well, I've rested. Have lots of energy and starting to feel like the old me again, so I thought what better way to begin anew than to stir up a little controversy. I mean emotions...or maybe that is thinking. Dangit where are those strikeout functions for blogger?

;-)

Warning: if you are new to this blog, please don't view the video below if:

• you want to remain in a bubble, have no feelings (either way)
• think times are changing and racism doesn't exist and
• think it's perfectly normal for the Duggars to have 1 more child. I don't know what the Duggars has to do with this video or post but seriously 19 kids? OUCHHHHHHHH

So, here is the video Bi-Racial Hair. I had so many emotions when I viewed it. There were many umms and oohhs and yeahs and yups and wows that came out of my mouth. I had to view it twice. My cousin said she had to undergo some brief trauma counseling afterward. LOL Let me know what you think and we can have a deeper conversation in the comments section.

Again...remember you have been warned. See this is the nicer, kinder, gentler Tami.

How Old?

Gotta get this one out there...How old do you think Baby I will be at referral?

So far I have 3 guessing games going:

• Name
• Age
• Date

Who will win? Maybe I can come up with some sort of prize but I tell you...you might not get it until next year! LOL Maybe the AW will mail it for me.

Top 5 Baby Names

Well here are the top 5 baby names for Baby I. One is actually my sunshine's name:

1. Ila
2. Isla
3. Ivy
4. Isley
5. Imani

So many names, so little time.

Let's Play: Guess that Date!

I was told by the Adoption Whisperer (AW-Robbin) that it was time for me to play a few games. So, Robbin, here I go following the rules of the adoption blogdom (or is that blogsphere?).

This game is just for shintz and giggles because I am terrible about mailing packages (sometimes they never get mailed). Sad, but true...so, there are NO prizes. Unless of course the AW wants to provide one to the winner. ;-)

Moving on...passing time.

When do you think I'll get my referral?

ARGGHHHHH!

Nothing else left to say!